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President Trump’s Christmas Address to the Nation

  • by Ellis Weiner
  • 26 December
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(The following is transcribed from the President’s official address to the nation on Christmas, 2017.)   My Fellow America: On this very special day, we..
Essays

It Turns Out You’ve Been Doing These Twelve Things Wrong!

  • by Andrew Nicholls
  • 19 December
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If you’re like us, whether from habit or from following the advice of parents, foster parents or cruel court-appointed guardians, you’ve been doing these dozen..
Correspondence

Letter to the Editor: I Want to Rent a Penis

  • by Janis Hirsch
  • 5 December
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To the Editor: I would like your readers to know that I want to rent a penis. Admittedly, I have never met a woman who..
LInt: The Literature of the Internet

Here Is Your Tracking Number For the Boil We just Removed From Your Ass

  • by Andrew Nicholls
  • 1 December
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Please write this number in a safe place:  TYO945-3567-988TT This is the tracking number for the boil we just removed from your ass. Many patients..

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